NO SHELF CONTROL

Title: Scattered

Author: Aamna Mohdin

Publisher: Bloomsbury Publishing

Publication Date: June, 2024

Genre: Memoir

Pages: 317

My Rating: ★★★★★

_{“This is a book about finding where I belong in the world”}

A heart wrenching and thought provoking memoir from a Somali refugee. “Scattered” tells the story of Aamna and her family’s transition into British Somalis and the horror story of how they got here.

As someone who was heavily involved with the Calais refugees, I knew this was a story I’d be interested in. And it didn’t disappoint.

_{“I look at the similarities between the refugee crisis I was born into, and the one I report on several decades later. Their fear and desperation is the same. Their deaths are the same. The response from the neighbouring countries, the indifference and hostility – that too has remained the same”}

Mama, in particular, I adored. What a brave, brave woman. What she must have gone through, as a mother, is the absolute stuff of nightmares. Deportation, imprisonment, being separated from her child. I can’t even begin to try and understand her experiences.

I learned so much about Somalia. The history, the people. And what stood out most to me was their laughter and their resilience. I found myself on Instagram and Google, wanting to know more. Wanting to see pictures and try and get a bigger sense of what the author was describing and where she was. I wanted to see the photography in Kakuma that she spoke of, I wanted to see the country she felt naturally at home in.

_{“Why do some children get to live their lives never worrying about whether they’d see their parents again? Why am I always losing one of my parents? Why was this the life that was chosen for me? Why don’t I just get to be a child?”}

The sense of family and the kindness from others was heartwarming. Aamna’s family, immediate and extended, provided great support along the way and the love she has for her parents in particular, just shines through the pages and made me smile. I found this book really emotive and I felt such a wide range of feelings throughout her story.

Aamna’s struggles didn’t end when she reached the UK. The racism she speaks of makes me cringe in embarrassment at the behaviour of my “fellow countrymen” and the story of Mama and her shoe only made me love her more!

_{“I scratched my legs and saw the white, ashy streaks it left behind. I started scratching myself all over, with a desperate vigour. I wanted to cover myself in those white ashy streaks. I scratched as deep into the skin as I could, wanting to tear at the blackness. I didn’t stop once I started bleeding.”}

I’ll never understand why Britain seems to have open arms for the Ukrainians, yet shun the African nations. The unashamed, outwardly racist, remarks that can be read in comments sections on social media are absolutely disgusting. I wish more people would educate themselves on the harrowing histories people have suffered in these countries.

I am so proud of you Aamna, for building a wonderful career, all the while supporting your family, discovering who you are, where you come from and integrating yourself into Britain. You’re truly remarkable.

Thank you to you, and NetGalley, for allowing me to read your story. I don’t think I’ve ever read a book that has taught me so much and been so thought provoking. This is one story that will stay with me.